My unconventional family

When you are a stepmother, people tend to put you in two different categories. You are either the bitchy witchy stepmother, or else you are trying to steal someone else’s kids away from their mother. So, stereotypically, the ex-wife is often portrayed as jealous and interfering, and the new wife is often the evil sneaky witch. Relationship forums are often full of these prickly problems.

I, on the other hand, received one of the biggest blessings of my life in my stepdaughter and her mother.

I could not have children of my own, which broke my heart. Having lost my parents and grandparents young, I longed to have a family of my own and knowing I would never have children or grandchildren was hard for me. I had to have a full hysterectomy at the age of 33.

But when I married I gained a wonderful daughter and also her mother, who is my best friend in Sweden.

My daughter Amanda loved me from day one. She made me a mother when I had no confidence in my ability. And her mother is one of the most generous, kind women I have ever known. I love Tina with my whole heart and would do absolutely anything for her.

Both of them have loved me, been there for me, protected me and been my family for all my time in Sweden. They are strong, beautiful, amazing woman. I cannot express how much I appreciate this wonderful gift that life has given me.  We three attend christenings, funerals, birthdays and weddings together. A couple of years ago Amanda gave Tina and I a couples spa day which we enjoyed so so much. We are family.

I count myself lucky to have these two women as my family. We are even all being buried together when we pop our clogs. I cannot express how much love and respect I have for them for opening their hearts and their precious family to me.

Today is my daughter’s birthday, the 22nd of this months is her mother’s birthday and the 23rd is mine.  So for the third year in a row we are having a joint birthday celebration. Pictures to follow.



Author: Janet Carr

Fashion, beauty and animal loving language consultant from South Africa living in Stockholm, Sweden.

5 thoughts

  1. What a beautiful story, Janet, I had a kick as a child and so my reproductive organs are underdeveloped and incomplete, so I understand the ache for a child. You have been truly blessed.

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