If Cats Wrote Haiku

By Angie Bailey

Cats are naturally meditative creatures; they often look like they’re immersed in super deep thoughts. I like to imagine them pondering heavy philosophical questions and feeling completely Zen. You know what else I think they’re doing? Writing haiku poetry. That’s right. I think I’ve even caught my Phoebe counting syllables on her toes. No lie.

What kind of haikus would they write? I have a few ideas — here are 9 of them!

Water dish is full
I cannot explain it but
Your cup looks better
Do not shed a tear
For I am always with you
My hair on your pants

“You shall not forget me.” Photo: Remy Sharp

At first you panic
Awake to chest heaviness
I’m sleeping on you

“I’m as close as your breath.” Photo: William J Sisti

Holiday sweater
I hope you kept the receipt
What were you thinking?

“Find the receipt. Now.” Photo: drew saunders

Please avert your eyes
As I lower my bottom
And prepare to poo

“Must you watch?” Photo: abbamouse

You close the window
It’s not too cold you liar
My life is ruined

“Liar.” Photo: Paulo Ordoveza

I like watching squirrels
I chirp at them but mostly
I want to taste them

“Come closer.” Photo: Jerry

You continue to 
Talk about Thanksgiving and
Now I want gravy
Do you not see my
Paw under the bathroom door?
Methinks you are blind

“My paw is not invisible.” Photo: Hitchster

 Do you like cats? Did you like this page? Well then, head off to Catster and read more of the above by the wonderful Angie Bailey who waxes lyrical about jiggly jungle bellies and cat toes. 

Author: Janet Carr

Fashion, beauty and animal loving language consultant from South Africa living in Stockholm, Sweden.

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