Worth keeping in mind

I am by no means an expert on life, but I have never done things the ‘expected’ way. I did not marry young and I was not in any hurry to settle down and have kids, despite the fact that it was the expected thing at the time. My mother married at 28 and she was a very old bride for her time. Almost all my friends from school married their school boyfriends. I stuck out like a sore thumb, not being interested in all that.

I got an education, travelled the world and lived in other countries. I lived by myself and was very set in my ways. I was not at all domesticated. Then, at the age of 35 I married and moved across the world to a country where I had to leave my career behind and start again, in a new language. I became a mother. I loved starting over and learning new things, even though society told me that at the age of 40 or so, I should have settled down much earlier.

After I got divorced, I felt that I had perhaps finally ended up in the ‘traditional’ rut for my age. A woman in her fifties, divorced with cats, and single forever. I cannot deny that I was lonely sometimes and wished I had someone to share old age with, but almost all the time I was really happy with my life. I loved being single and free. Was I finally where society expected me to be at my age? A grey old lady with sweets in her pockets and lots of cats?

But BAM, at the wrong time of my life – according to stereotypes – I ended up meeting someone, falling head over heels in love for the first time in my life, moving house, sharing my life with someone and getting married again. Things that are not really supposed to happen, according to the way our society sees things. I didn’t expect this change, and in the beginning I didn’t want it, but it happened anyway, and I am the happiest I have ever been.

One of my Instagram favourites, Chic Over 50 (Shauna), has also just married, at the age of 59. A year ago she thought she would be single forever, but life went the other way.

So we are both proof that your life will happen at its own pace. Maybe not the way you or society expects, but it is never too late for anything.

Author: Janet Carr

Fashion, beauty and animal loving language consultant from South Africa living in Stockholm, Sweden.

3 thoughts

  1. I needed this tonight. It gave me some hope. I’m 48 and going through a divorce and feeling very alone and empty. He is getting on with his life and I believe seeing someone and I’m thinking how more difficult it seems to be for a middle aged woman to find love. I’ve also just started college!!! Which is scary and fun at the same time. Yikes!!! I hope this will be a new start for me as I’ve been very unhappy for many years and reading your post was like a gift to say hang in there, there’s always tomorrow and we never know what that might bring xx. Thank you 🙂

    1. Sometimes things do not go exactly as society tells us they have to. Definitely hang in there and let things happen at the pace they are meant to. Much love and all the best for your studies!

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